The longer we live, the more things can happen to us.  Many of those things can lead to anger. Carrying that around can do a lot of damage to ourselves, as well as those who have to live with us, or deal with us on a daily basis. However, forgiveness is easier said than done.


Learning to let go of the anger and forgive people can be very difficult to do, especially since we are justified in our feelings, and we don't want to let that justification go. But in the long run, our desire to hang on to that hostility only hurts us.  It can lead to serious illness, high blood pressure, strokes, heart attacks, depression. Here are some tips to getting rid of those feelings.


Don't let anyone force you into forgiving someone before you've worked in through. Sometimes it leads to empty forgiveness, and you'll keep reliving the bad experiences and feelings that you've been carrying. You may then not feel the need to ever bring up the thought of forgiveness to that person again.


When you meditate, you are at one with your emotions in a quiet atmosphere.Meditation doesn't necessarily have to mean sitting. At my most difficult times, I run, jog or walk it out alone. I find a quiet country road, and just take off. No music...just me and my thoughts. Running every evening til the sun went down got me through some very difficult times a few years ago. I still remember how good it makes me feel to run off bad feelings today.


We don't always realize why we are upset. Writing down your thoughts can help you clear the clutter of your mind and help you better understand your feelings. Once you write down how you feel, you can take your notes and burn them, crumple them up. It can help to watch something that hurt you disintegrate before your eyes, no matter how you choose to do it.


Instead of focusing on how someone did you wrong, you need to focus on how your actions are affecting others, as well as yourself. I had to talk with friends for months before I would accept that the person that hurt me, really hurt themselves...I just happened to be in the middle of it. Realize that the mistakes of others, aren't necessarily your cross to bear. Usually, if they've hurt you, they are hurting much more than you know, and they have to deal with not only the pain they've caused you, but the pain and sometimes shame that they will have to carry from now on. It helped me to realize that the things the other person "did to me" were actually things they did to themselves. Once I realized this, it was easier for me to move forward. There was nothing wrong with me, it's just that the other person made decisions based on their wants and desires. Sometimes we get stuck in the middle.


Stop living in the past. You have today, tomorrow, the next day. Sometimes TIME is the healer. But you can speed it along by pushing yourself to enjoying the here and now. It might not be easy at first...but believe me....just keep pushing.

Original article found at