Some spouses have discovered phrases that help stop the fighting and start the road to recovery before irreversible damage can be done.  See if you think these phrases might work in your relationship, and help end the silly bickering.

"What can we do to make things better right now?"

This phrase supposedly puts focus back on your partner.  It's a phrase that will show you are committed to fixing a problem, rather than engaging in a knock out round.  Try it.

"Help me understand where you are coming from."

When you're fighting it's easy to get lost in the meaning of the disagreement. Both parties could be fighting for different things.  Saying this can help you get back on track to defining and figuring out a solution to your problem.

"Are we having an argument?"

Sometimes just making a simple statement can make you realize that maybe you find yourselves frequently fighting at the same time every day, or maybe about the same issue, so if that's the case...recognize that it's happening, and name it.  Like,  oh...This is our CRAB APPLE HOUR isn't it?  It allows you both to lighten the mood, and check yourselves before continuing with an argument that is completely unnecessary.

"You're so handsome...even when we argue."

It might sound like you're trying to get out of this discussion, but it can also show that you still think he's the hottest thing since toasted bread.

"Is this worth fighting about?"

Decide if this argument even deserves to be recognized.  Working together is what you do...So decide if this is really that important and if it is...proceed. If not, give each other a smile...kiss...or hug, and move forward.

Recognizing that EVERYONE is different and has a different perspective can help realize how to come to an agreement that will allow you both to remain individual yet understand each others point of view.

 

 

 

 

 

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