You'll be begging for your kid to ask for an iPad after reading this list.

You wouldn't think Santa could blush with his already rosy red cheeks, but even he couldn't help but feel a little awkward after hearing some of these kids Christmas wish.

Kids have no filter when they're telling Santa their deepest secret desires, and that's why Mall Santas get more insight into kids' psyches than ANYONE.

Mall Santas around the country shared the strangest things kids have ever asked them for.

This is the TOP 10.

1. "A remote control buffalo." (what happen to remote control cars, or even an airplane?)

2. "A unicorn that poops rainbows." (ummm...)

3. "A 'penis' book." The kid meant Peanuts, but couldn't pronounce it. (ok, honest mistake)

4. "Change my name to Batman." (I AM Batman)

5. "A box of condoms." The kid was around eight or nine. (ummm... I think this kid must have meant balloon animals)

6. "A lifetime supply of peanut butter so my dog will lick my face forever." (man's best friend, indeed)

7. "To know how elves reproduce." (good question)

8. "A gumball machine filled with avocados." (what kid even knows what a gumball machine is, if they're eating avocados)

9. "To destroy all Backstreet Boys CDs." (Chad Taylor would not be pleased with this child)

10. "For the neighbor lady to stop coming over when my mom is at work." (... busted)

Check out even more strange things kids have asked Santa for HERE.