My Cat Got Called For Jury Duty!
Sal is a good cat. He's friendly, loves to play, and is extremely good with the other animals in the house. He loves people, too, and that's a good thing. He's going to need his "people" skills in the weeks and months to come. You see, Sal has been summoned for jury duty.
This is NOT a joke! OK, well it sort of is, but the point is that this is really happening right now in Boston, Massachusetts. Sal's owners listed him on their 2010 census under 'pets'. They also are trying to get Sal disqualified for jury duty, claiming that he apparently can neither speak, nor understand, English. The Feds in Boston are not buying it - the court rejected their request - Sal the Kitty will report to jury duty on March 23rd, 2011.
I'm torn, personally, because I love animals. I have three cats at home right now that I am sure are smarter than many people who have served on a jury. Cats, like women, are usually much smarter than you first believe they are (or than they will let on to be). Most would disagree with me, but I believe cats are infinitely smarter than dogs. I'm not saying I like them better, that's just a life long observation.
The problem is though, that cats - like women (are you sensing a theme?) - can be easily bribed or persuaded. Oh, come on, you know exactly what I'm talking about. They give you a certain look when they crave attention or affection. My cat would ROB A BANK for me, just for opening a can of tuna. Last week I opened a bag of catnip, held it over Haven's head - and he started reciting The Gettysburgh Address, at least that is what I thought it was.
And while we're at it - don't you think a TV show along these lines could be very successful. A cat on jury duty. It's been about 30 years since Alf, so why not? I realize Alf was an alien, but I always thought of him as a fuzzy dog/cat kind of thing, anyway.
And I have the perfect name for a courtroom TV drama show of this kind...."CATLOCK".....or......."L.A. CLAW".