Past struggles can ruin your positive outlook. Learning from past mistakes or things that have happened to you in your life, are an important part of moving foward to be your best.  But if you are one of those people who obsess over what's already happened, you need to learn to let it go.  Carrying all that baggage keeps you down.  If you are obsessing in the following areas, learn to let go, move forward, and find your way to a happy healthy life.



People who can’t let go of their pasts often get passed over for promotions.  They expect negative things to happen to them, because  that's the way "it's always been."  This negative focus takes away from your ability to focus and be productive.  Turn the page and start to think about what’s really happening in your career. Then, remember that you’re in charge of your happiness.  You have to look for good, rather than focus on bad.  Focusing on the future pays off professionally.


Being their for a friend who is down once in a while, is something we all do. BUT!  No one wants to be friends with someone who’s just waiting for her to do something wrong, or who can't ever let go of anything.  It used to drive me crazy that I had friends that didn't want me to make NEW friends....WHAT?!  Really?!   If you resent others without any particular reason, acknowledge  that you feel this way, and try to shift your focus immediately.  If you want to keep friends...let them breath happily.


Do you pick fights with your partner or refuse to open up to them because your ex burned you? Not all people will cheat.  Some people couldn't do it if they tried!  Rather than focusing on feeling sorry for yourself,  try to identify why things didn’t work out with a previous partner, and focus on the positive things in your  life and use that information to make better choices  in the future.


A lot of hurt in adults come from childhood experiences, and a strained relationship with your family can make you less patient with your kids. Forgiveness is key...Not for the person you are forgiving..but for your own sake, and that of your family.  Let it go. This isn't minimizing what happened to you, it just means you accept it since it cannot be changed, and move forward.  Realize that this can take some time, depending on what happened.  Give yourself time to figure it out, and if you can't get over it, find a  free or low-cost therapy option.  Just being able to discuss your feelings with someone can really help you start the healing process, and it will keep you from ruining all your friendships.


Weight fluctuations happen, but while you’re not happy about your size, you’re not entirely motivated to lose. Not being able to move on can cause hormone levels to get out of balance, causing weight gain and depression......stress not only causes you to pack on pounds but also zaps motivation to do something about it. Overcoming depression takes time, but Meditation is a great way to release stress.  Start focusing on how to help others, or just getting out of the house.   I used to just run like Forrest Gump.  I ran and ran and ran.  It helped.  I couldn't get over things, so I ran until I was so tired I couldn't run any more.  Sometimes I would run and walk for hours.  It helped me.



If you often wake up in the middle of the night, or too early in the morning, and don’t feel rested, you may be suffering from insomnia — and your inability to let things go may be to blame.  Stress from the death of a loved one or divorce are common causes of insomnia — and so is stress from holding on to anger from your past. Sleeplessness may seem manageable for a while, but  it interferes with productivity, relationships and healing.   Try taking a natural sleep aid, and again...ask for help.


Any financial planner will tell you that ignoring your financial future is a big mistake, but for people who are stuck in the past, this keeps them from moving forward.  Try to start thinking ahead, even if you don't feel like it.  This process will free you from the fear of the mistake (or mistakes) you might keep on making, and allow you to build that nest egg.


Chronic anger has been shown to increase blood pressure, accelerate hardening of the arteries and this sort of anxiety also can cause unexplained pain, GI issues, aging skin, rashes and breakouts. Surprisingly, experts say  It’s easy to reverse it.  So many of these things happened to me during and after my break up that I know it's true.  Try writing down (or speaking aloud) everything you have to be thankful for every morning — things in your present, not your past.