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If You Love Your iPhone So Much Why Don’t You Marry It?

Recently a ‘scientist’ named Martin Lindstrom conducted MRI’s on iPhone users in an effort to determine just how addicted the users had become- but little did he know he would discover something much more shocking; That we actually LOVE our iPhones.

No. Seriously. We have fallen in true, deep and emotional L-O-V-E with these insidious sleek purveyors of digital ecstasy.

Martin is more a ‘branding consultant’ than a ‘scientist’, but the results were shocking even to him. Writing about his findings in ‘The New York Times’ (we’d give you the link, but it would be worthless since you have PAY to read the NYT online), Lindstrom said;

“Most striking of all was the flurry of activation in the insular cortex of the brain, which is associated with feelings of love and compassion. The subjects’ brains responded to the sound of their phones as they would respond to the presence or proximity of a girlfriend, boyfriend or family member.  In short, the subjects didn’t demonstrate the classic brain-based signs of addiction. Instead, they loved their iPhones.”

Apparently this is in stark contrast to what our brains do when MRI’d with images of Facebook, Twitter and video games.

So if you’ve already spurned your iPhone 3Gs’s affectionate and old-timey advances… or you’re just not ‘feelin’ it’ with that brilliant, pure and emotionally unavailable lily-white iPhone 4– not to worry lonely heart… Love-Guru Steve Jobs is about to satisfy your every lustful tendency with the iPhone 5 sometime this week.


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