How to Find Love in 2013
If your New Year's resolution is to get over your ex and find love, here are a few ideas to help you find someone in time for Valentine's Day.
Know What You Want
First, know what you want. That way, when your date asks you, you'll you know how to answer the question, "What are you looking for?" When I was dating, I was asked that question a few times and I didn't know how to answer because I hadn't thought about it. When you answer, answer honestly. If you're looking for someone to marry, say so. That way it's on the table. If the person you're dating isn't looking to get married, you know right off the bat that neither one of you should get attached. It will save a lot of time. When I was asked "What are you looking for" I knew I wasn't looking to get married and it took a lot of pressure off.
Be Ready for It
Get to a place in your head where you're ready to date someone. If you were burned in your last relationship, work past it and don't automatically assume that it's going to happen again. Understand that you're going to know the warning signs and will be strong enough to sever ties if you can see the signs that it's going to happen again. Don't walk into your next relationship thinking that they're going to cheat or whatever your ex did to hurt you. Don't start your next relationship with negative feelings.
Accept a Little Imperfection
We all have high standards, but no one is going to meet all of your criteria on your 150 point dating checklist. No one. But, on the other hand, don't settle too much and sacrifice who you are for the sake of a relationship. I tried becoming someone else for someone and it just didn't work. Plus it was exhausting. He was really hot, but at the end of the day, I didn't like his noisy mean bird, I hated his taste in music and clubbing wasn't one of my favorite activities.
Get Out There
Now you know what you want, it's time to get out there. You're great and no one is going to know that if you're in your sweats on the couch watching a Breaking Bad marathon. Join a bowling league, softball team, volleyball team or take a class through community ed. There are also a number of services on the web for singles that cater to busy adults looking to get out there and meet someone. One out of every five new relationships starts online, so give it a shot. The services will plan the outing for you. All you have to do is be fabulous and show up. Or, just join an online dating service. I lost a bet and was forced to do it. It wasn't horrible and I did end up meeting someone and dating them for a few months.
Be a Good Date
Even if you're on a blind date or a set up, go into it determined to have fun with a positive attitude and sunny disposition. If you're thinking negative thoughts before you get to meet them, it's going to show. Have an open mind about it. You may be pleasantly surprised.