I hate scary movies. I avoid them like the plague. In fact, I've only seen a couple movies I would consider scary in my lifetime, and most people probably wouldn't even classify them as proper "horror" films (ie. Hide and Seek, Donnie Darko).

In retrospect, my fear of "scary" movies may stem from my childhood. My mother subjected my sisters and me to some pretty bizarre films growing up. Of course, I'm sure she meant well - we could watch mom-approved G and PG movies until we were 13, and even then they required my dad's approval first. Still, I wonder if I wasn't a sensitive child, and even the least scary movies left an impression.

So as we near Halloween, here are some movies I won't be watching this year (though you're welcome to for nostalgia's sake):

1. Labrynth, 1986

Credit: Henson Associates, Inc.; Lucasfilm Ltd.

Say what you will about this film, but David Bowie's character scared me, his puppet-minions terrified me, and the scene of the baby brother crying in Bowie's lair reminds me of the MGMT music video for Kids.

 

2. The Dark Crystal, 1982

Credit: Henson Associates; ITC Entertainment

Another one of those bizarre films, I don't know if I ever really understood the plot. I was too fascinated by the unusual creature-characters, moved by Kira's death scene and afraid of crumbling into dust like the emperor.

 

3. Gremlins, 1984

Credit: Amblin Entertainment

In the span of just two minutes within the movie, freaky-looking gremlins are processed, stabbed and microwaved to death. That's scarring to a child.

 

1. The Ghost and Mr. Chicken, 1966

Credit: Universal Pictures

Now you're really going to laugh, and perhaps rightly so. After all, The Ghost and Mr. Chicken is a comedy! But as a kid, the whole movie haunted me even into my teenage years - the organ that played by itself, the bleeding portraits on the staircase, and the butler that frequently appeared out of nowhere. This movie just wasn't good for my heart.