Dead Canadien Chili Eats Ty James Alive

For the past four weeks you've heard the battle and trash talk between myself and Ty James about our respective chili's. This past Saturday night, during the 5th Annual Cold Spring JC Soup & Chili Bowl our culinary fate was decided by you. The winner of the 3rd Annual MIX 94.9 Chili Cook-Off is- NO ONE.

In a dramatic and slightly irritating turn, the final tally of 262 votes revealed that our chilis were liked equally. 130 votes were cast for our Afternoon Jammer Ty James and 130 votes cast for me (Peter K).

But what of the two votes left over? Backstory is required.

In an effort to shore up what I perceived as an 'alphabetic' advantage, I encouraged tasters to just vote for PK (my initials). I thoughtfully scrawled with pen on each serving cup my initials PK. Further explaining, as I handed my Canadien concoction to the waiting hands, "That all your voting information is on the cup."

So as we counted the votes, many wrote 'PK' and some wrote Peter K... Many wrote 'TY', and some wrote Ty James. However, on those two stray votes, neatly penned were the mysterious letters 'PY'. Now of course, Ty tried to lay claim to these 'hanging chads' of chili, but was immediately rebuffed in his scurrilous attempt at cheating for a 3rd year in a row. We had employed a third party to handle such disputes; Justin (a former Canadian Football League referee). Ty as well had given me his stalwart word that the field would be level this year, no shenanigans would be perpetrated.

After the results were explained to each of us, being the chivalrous gentleman that I am, I extended my hand, a gesture of truce, a quest for peace between the tribes, so to speak. As Ty James pulled hand from jeans pocket to shake, a grocery receipt wafted into the air. I have fast reflexes and snatched the stray paper from the air... However, my SECOND gentlemanly act of the evening, was rewarded with treachery! As I glanced as the receipt, I saw he had purchased 5 cans of Hormel Chili! I was shocked. I was stunned!

Like a bolt of lightening, Ty James grabbed the scandalous paper from my hand and proceeded to EAT IT! As I cried FOUL, he laughed and gulped loudly. My proof was now on it's way to becoming just poo.

So it is with great pride I proclaim myself the winner once again. If you think this dispute should be handled by the courts, I whole-heartedly agree. This is why I am taking my case to the Florida Supreme Court for a decision. We should have the official and lawful ruling shortly.

In the meantime, as promised, I reveal the entire ingredient list for my 3rd year-in-a-row-winning 'Dead Canadien Chili': Copy this down and make your family happy.

DEAD CANADIEN CHILI

by Peter K

Makes about 6 quarts-
25 FRESH (OR 4 QUART JARS CANNED/PRESERVED) TOMATOES
3 LARGE PEPPERS (ONE EACH RED/YELLOW/ORANGE
1 ANAHEIM PEPPER
4 FRESH (CANNED/PRESERVED) JALAPENOS PEPPERS
2 FRESH (CANNED/PRESERVED) CHIPOTLE PEPPERS
1 YELLOW ONION
1 CUP MN MADE HONEY
1/4 CUP WORCESTERSHIRE SAUCE
1/4 CUP SOY SAUCE
2 LBS GROUND BUFFALO
1 LBS THICK SLICED BACON
2 MOOSEHEAD
2 TABLESPOONS CHILI POWDER
2 TABLESPOONS CUMIN
2 TABLESPOONS FRESH GROUND BLACK PEPPERCORNS
2 TSP SEA SALT

Combine all veggies, peppers and spices in a big pot and slowly bring to a boil to create the base. Back heat off and simmer, covered.

While the base is coming to boil, fry up your bacon until it’s crispy, NOT burned. This allows the bacon to soak up some of the base. Drain half of the bacon grease off into the base, then put all the ground buffalo into the remaining bacon grease to fry. I use buffalo because it’s incredibly lean, and this allows you to use the bacon grease in your base for an extra smoky flavor and to get the buffalo some moisture. When the buffalo is nice and brown, drop all the bacon, buffalo, honey, Worcestershire and soy sauce into the pot with the base.

After you’ve simmered the pot for an hour, add the Moosehead. But be careful, because when the Moosehead hits the chili, there will be a lot of foam. It will settle as the Moosehead cooks down. I use Moosehead because it really ties the chili together.  Hence the name: Dead Canadien Chili.

Serve it up with the rest of your Moosehead and enjoy!